Right, I'm blaming my rants on the fact this is my 3rd week off the smokes ... but you've guessed it, here comes another. I went to my bank this 11am. It was shut. Heaven forbid someone might actually want to use their bank on a Saturday morning. The foyer was open however, allowing you to take money out of the cash machines or pay money in. Brilliant! I wanted to pay a cheque in. I took one of the little envelopes, put my cheque inside and duly sealed it. I reached over to the undersized shelf to fill in the blanks only to find - after much frantic scribbling - the pen didn't work. No matter, I could always use the pen at the other undersized shelf ... if only there had actually been a pen on the end of what was now a short length of those silver bead things.
Unable to pay my cheque in, I went to do some shopping at the supermarket. I couldn;t find what I was looking for because it wasn't in its usual space ... because it had been moved - in SEPTEMBER - to make way for Christmas stuff!
To top it all, Liverpool have just lost to Bolton. HUMPH!

My latest mission statement ...

I've wanted to start 'something', 'somewhere' where the self or wannabe published can come together and showcase their books. Either on a bloody great website or with links or just swapping marketing tips. There are probably these things already out there and they're probably already charging a fortune ...
After being told I couldn't get involved at the Edinburgh book festival because I was self-published, i started thinking, what if a 'fringe' book festival could be organised to showcase UNPUBLISHED peoples work, wouldn't that be great?!?! I'm prepared to give it a go. I guess I just need someone to tell me it's a good idea and not another of my pie-in-the-sky nonsense dreams. I mean, with 200 submissions a week landing on agents desks, there's a lot more of us 'failures' out there than the ones who have made it. It would be HUGE! I just need to find some others ...
Right anyway, I've decided I'm going to start a community ... RIGHT HERE, RIGHT NOW. If you want to showcase your work on my website ... send me an email at lee@leecrompton.com or globalcrommers@yahoo.co.uk. THE END!

I'm sorry, I know I prone to keep doing this, but I feel another rant coming on. (You have to be quick to see them though because I usually feel guilty and edit or delete them or somebody tells me off). Today, I am mostly hacked off with adverts. Following my (Connor's) rant in Worlds Apart, I still feel that Western society sucks. Whilst in other parts of the world people are starving, don't have clean water or two pennies to rub together, we're bombarded with adverts selling 'product of the year' hair stuff and TURBO QUATTRO SUPER NITRO CHARGED RAZORS & GEL! What a nonsense. We should now be shaving with 5 blades apparently. The reason? Because you don't have to press so hard and therefore cause LESS IRRITATION. Will it be the case that in 5 years time razors will be a foot wide to fit all the blades required from the ever demanding consumer? Some of them, I understand, are now also battery operated! What was ever wrong with just 1 blade. They still use the Sweeny Todd type in Turkey and they appear to work ... just fine.
This is just an example of course but Western Society is driving me barking mad! Another reason is our obsession with celebrities. Again, despite all the troubles in the world, newspapers recently decided it was more important to report that a statue had been unveiled which was a representation of what Tom Cruise & thingy's baby POOP (yes, poop!) probably looked like. I mean ... is it just me????
To end with, my girlfriend was in tears yesterday. WHY? I hear you ask. Was it because she'd been upset at the news that an airplane carrying at least 150 people had vanished in the amazon or because another 13 more people had been killed in a car bomb attack in the middle east? No, the photocopier at university failed to print and had eaten her lat £3 of credit. Sources close to my girlfriend confirmed, 'it had been the end of a very frustrating day.'

In association with Poole libraries & Waterstone's , I've kindly been invited to give a talk on the 'Joys of Getting Published' as part of the Poole Readers & Writers Week. My bit takes place on Saturday 28th October at 2pm at Poole central library and tickets are available at the desk or by phone (01202 262421). Don't let the £2 entrance fee put you off. As well as getting to hear me waffle on, it also includes refreshments. My mum will be so proud!

I'm still not sure about whether to go all creative and arty-farty and describe the 'joy' of finally seeing my work in print or be my usual sarcastic, cynical self and moan on about all the pit-falls and barriers I've encountered along the way. It's a tough one!

I've always liked the idea of having the sample chapters of my books available for people to download for free so that they can listen to them on their iPods or MP3 players ... hence I signed up to JELLYCAST.

The only thing is, I tried to record my own podcast and couldn't stand the sound of my own voice (now I know how everyone else feels)

So ... I've started a competition to find the 'voice of Connor'. More info is available on the website but basically you stand a chance of winning an MP3 player if your audio file is any good. Best of Luck!

I am currently in discussions with Book Aid with a view to donating a number of my books to their cause.

Book Aid International works in 18 countries in sub-Saharan Africa and Palestine, providing over half a million books and journals each year to libraries, hospitals, refugee camps and schools.

It occured to me that instead of bookcrossing my novels in random telephone boxes and changing rooms for other people to have a free read and pass judgement, why not give them people who can't afford them or don't have access to books.

For the longer term Book Aid International is supporting the growth of local publishing and bookselling so that affordable books can be produced which reflect the local languages and culture.

Not that I'm name dropping (haha!) but a friend of mine (who just happens to be an international model) will be strutting the catwalk in Portsmouth next month at the OneWorld FairTrade Fashion Show.

Just to get you in the mood, I'll rattle of some stats I've come across (or rather, my girlfreind came across ... I believe this is the first time she has been mentioned, but we won't go into that now, especially when I've just revealed a friend of mine is an international model) whilst doing some research for the screenplay.

$1.5 trillion is traded on the world money markets every day. In 1997, the turnover of General Motors EXCEEDED the GDP of Thailand

The wealth of the 200 richest people in the world exceeded the income of the poorest 41% of the world population.

The wealth of the worlds 3 richest billionaires exceeds the combined GNP of ALL the least developed countries (some 600 million people in total)

These figures were taken from the United Nations Development Program (UNDP) 1999

I don't think there's anything to add to that really is there ...?!?!

Apologies for the lack of updates recently. Just returned from 2 weeks in the sun and nothing to report other than it was very pleasant, relaxing and I managed to get more of the thriller rattled off.

Other news on my return, I have been asked to present some seminars/workshops at a book festival on the South Coast at the end of next month. When I know a few more details I'll let you know.