And so probably the last of my reports from the Edinburgh Festival, with the 3 final shows to go.

Something a little more highbrow for Mum. A play called "Orphans". My review? Quite enjoyed it for someone who thought they weren't keen on theatre, ending a bit strange and they used the "c" word more times than the comedy show we'd seen earlier in the week. 8/10

I can't even remember the name of the 2nd show. Gemma wanted to see it and it was ok (at best). Something to do with "Craig still watches Neighbours" and was about a bloke who still watches Neighbours and included him playing clips from Neighbours and making averagely funny remarks about them ... along with some other VERY random bits chucked in 6/10.

And then, we saved the best until last ... Tom Wrigglesworth. It's ultimately a show about a particularly eventful train journey he had from Manchester to London with Virgin but it's a must see, very funny and he seems like a really top bloke (who really likes Vimto ... I know that because I was chatting to him at the bar before the gig ... about Vimto ... although at that stage I didn't have a clue who he was)

So a big fat 9/10 for Tom. A fitting way to end our festival fun for another year!

In other news, thought I'd share with you that the Digging Deeper film script has been sent to FluidEye Productions in Edinburgh for their assessment and a copy of all three of my books will be winging their way down to London tomorrow to be scrutinised by an agent I've been lucky enough to have a chat with.

Will keep you posted.

Received my certificate from Bowel Cancer UK this morning ... so I'd like to say a big thanks (and an individual hug) to everyone who helped raise the £5,288.90.

Admittedly it was me who did all the bloody training and hill climbing, but at least we managed to raise a massive amount a cash in the process, so thank you.

Now, with Mum up for the festival over the weekend, what better way to play it safe than take her to a couple of safe shows before the even safer banker of the Edinburgh Tattoo.

Friday saw us start our schedule with a nice and safe lunchtime "best of the fest" in which you get a 10 min taste of 4 top comedians from the festival ... only one of which I've heard of. First up was Justin Moorhouse (the guy from Phoenix Nights) who was very good and I'll give a 7/10. He was followed by a not quite as funny Irish fella (is it worth giving him a rating if I can't remember his name? 6/10). Then came a very short "comedian" who wasn't very funny at all (but not as bad as Vladimir McTavish, so a 4/10) and then a very good, but very rude New Zealand comic who used the "c" word 5 times during his 10 minutes, which sent me into regular sideways glances to see how Mum was reacting to her Edinburgh experience. Anyway, this guy was supposed to be New Zealand's top comic ... although having done a google image search, I can't find any trace of him. Anyway, he'd be a 7/10 but downgrading him to a 6.5 for saying the "c" word a lot ... in front of my mum ... at a lunchtime show ... and for being fairly intimidating.

So, with nothing else to see until the Tattoo and the rain beating down, we decided to take shelter in the form of a wild card option ... Early Long Island Iced Tea which is directed by Mel Smith (yes, as in Smith and Jones) and I therefore thought it might be mildly funny. Didn't know if it was a play, musical or whatever, but it was certainly full of people more my Mum's age. It was an hour of caberet singing, and hour of caberet singing by an old queen (with a cracking voice it has to be said) singing old songs in an overly dramatic way. To add insult to injury, there were a few attempts at comical interludes which fell flat on their faces (unless you were of a certain age) which I presume were the inventions of Mr Smith. I was ready to cut my own ears off by the end of the hour. Mum seemed to enjoy it however.

Then onto the Tattoo. What a spectacle, not even dampened by having to sit in the heavy rain with my hood up and a bin liner over my legs. All in the name of "festival" my friends, all in the name of "festival".

Next up, Jason Cook with his new show, FEAR.

Nothing unexpected here. Saw him last year, brilliant. Saw him again this year, still brilliant.

You'll notice their are no accolades from the Guardian on his poster.

Top quality. Go see.

At this time of year, the papers are full of reviews for various shows at the Edinburgh Festival, and maaaaan, there's a lot of them. You can't walk anywhere in the city without a flyer or 10 being thrust into your path, all seemingly rated as the best show at the fringe by such and such.

But then it's all down to a matter of taste. I will therefore give humble opinion on shows to go and see and those to be avoided ... in order of appearance.

Vladimir McTavish: The Top 50 Scots Of All Time Pt II.

"A 2008 sell-out. Another affectionately scathing critique of one small nation's greatest icons."

‘Gleefully indulgent, highly appealing’ Guardian.

Now, I'm not a Guardian reader, in fact on the basis of their reviews, I don't intend to ever read the Guardian as my take on things would appear to be in direct contrast to this particular newspaper.

Far be it for me to be judgemental, but if I had seen the picture of Vladimir before we'd bought the tickets, I wouldn't have bothered. He doesn't strike me as the type of man who is going to make me laugh ... and he didn't, only in sympathy by the end of an gruellingly uncomforatble hour. I'm not sure how the Guardian could have thought otherwise. I was kind and gave him 5/10. Gemma (who is usually much kinder than me) gave him a 3/10 and said that was being generous. One to be missed in our opinion.

Sign up for the FREE FACEBOOK BOOKSHARE.

The idea came from bookcrossing.com where you can "release books into the wild" by registering it on their site (which gives it a unique number) and then leaving it in a random place (say a phone box or restaurant), letting people know on the website where you have left it and then another person finds it, reads it, reviews it on the site and leaves it in a random place for someone else to find (and so on and so forth).

I therefore signed up my own books and released them but they didn't like that very much because they said it was self-publicity (you're supposed to release books you've read and enjoyed, not ones you've written yourself) and not in the spirit of bookcrossing. I said this was a load of nonsense and why should my book be any different to anyone elses and they said ... we have some very top-profile authors on their site and if they self-promoted their own books they would shut down their profile too ... and I said something along the lines of "well I'm sure Stephen King doesn't have too much bother with publicity and wouldn't have to resort to releases his own books for free on bookcrossing in any case."

Needless to say, we fell out (apologies for the ultra-long sentences). So ... (deep breath) what I'm proposing to do is my own book crossing where you say which title you want to read, I send it to the 1st person that signs up, they read it, review it on the fan page, and then send it to the next person on the list, and so on a so forth ... so it's like a book share where all it costs you is the postage to send it to the next person on the list.

Does this make sense? Just leave you're name and the book you would like to read on my Facebook fan page (or send me a message) and I'll contact you with the craic.

Happy reading!

Now onto the next project, book 4. If you've been reading the earlier posts you'll know that I'll be returning to this once the film script is submitted far and wide.

Is it an image like this that puts people off the next book or possibly my writing ability? I'd like to thing it's the former. As soon as you mention it has the undead in it, people (especially girls) begin to turn their noses up.

All I wanted to say was ... ok, ok, it's going to be a book with zombie-esque characters in it but it's ultimately a book about survival and human emotions (God, that sounds boring) but a funny take on human emotions and surviving (now it sounds like an happy clappy self-help novel ... with zombies in it).

Look, all I'm saying is keep the faith. I'm writing it for me as I feel it deals with a lot of issues close to my heart but at the same time has a cracking story (I hope, still working on it) and is (as you would come to expect) a quirky, funny (dare I say HILARIOUS? Probably not) roller coaster of a yarn.

So don't be put off if you don't like zombies. It's going to be better written than anything I've done before, more amusing than 12 Months and Worlds Apart combined, have great characters, cracking storyline and leave you wishing the zombies would never end. This is going to be the last book before the snowball topples down the mountain side and really starts to gather momentum. I can feel it. You have been warned.

This is great. I'm actually receiving emails badgering me for updates. I never knew you cared.

Well my faithful followers (I don't think we'll need more than a pipe of Pringles for the catering for the first fan club meeting), my apologies for the lack of info. To use the words of my Mother-in-Law, I've had a touch of paralysis by analysis. I am formulating a plan however and it goes a little something like this.

I'm very close to finishing the second draft of the screenplay. I will then be sending it to Fluid Eye Productions (aka Doug who used to take my scriptwriting course - http://www.fluideyeproductions.co.uk/) for his keen fluid eye and valued comments. Then, making the changes and adjustments required to get to a final script I'm happy with.

As far as I see it, it's then a case of submitting it to anyone who will listen. The BBC accept submissions (unlike Channel 4, damn you) and I've also found this website, https://www.withoutabox.com/, which lists just about every film festival going on the planet.

It's something I've never really done ... the being patient and submitting things I mean. None of the books have been touted around the circuit as I just feel it's easier and quicker to do the bloody thing myself. So ... watch this space as they say. Won't be long until I actually start submitting things ... to people ... who know what they're talking about (allegedly).

Fingers crossed pleased, oh faithful handful of blog followers!