And so probably the last of my reports from the Edinburgh Festival, with the 3 final shows to go.

Something a little more highbrow for Mum. A play called "Orphans". My review? Quite enjoyed it for someone who thought they weren't keen on theatre, ending a bit strange and they used the "c" word more times than the comedy show we'd seen earlier in the week. 8/10

I can't even remember the name of the 2nd show. Gemma wanted to see it and it was ok (at best). Something to do with "Craig still watches Neighbours" and was about a bloke who still watches Neighbours and included him playing clips from Neighbours and making averagely funny remarks about them ... along with some other VERY random bits chucked in 6/10.

And then, we saved the best until last ... Tom Wrigglesworth. It's ultimately a show about a particularly eventful train journey he had from Manchester to London with Virgin but it's a must see, very funny and he seems like a really top bloke (who really likes Vimto ... I know that because I was chatting to him at the bar before the gig ... about Vimto ... although at that stage I didn't have a clue who he was)

So a big fat 9/10 for Tom. A fitting way to end our festival fun for another year!

In other news, thought I'd share with you that the Digging Deeper film script has been sent to FluidEye Productions in Edinburgh for their assessment and a copy of all three of my books will be winging their way down to London tomorrow to be scrutinised by an agent I've been lucky enough to have a chat with.

Will keep you posted.

Received my certificate from Bowel Cancer UK this morning ... so I'd like to say a big thanks (and an individual hug) to everyone who helped raise the £5,288.90.

Admittedly it was me who did all the bloody training and hill climbing, but at least we managed to raise a massive amount a cash in the process, so thank you.

Now, with Mum up for the festival over the weekend, what better way to play it safe than take her to a couple of safe shows before the even safer banker of the Edinburgh Tattoo.

Friday saw us start our schedule with a nice and safe lunchtime "best of the fest" in which you get a 10 min taste of 4 top comedians from the festival ... only one of which I've heard of. First up was Justin Moorhouse (the guy from Phoenix Nights) who was very good and I'll give a 7/10. He was followed by a not quite as funny Irish fella (is it worth giving him a rating if I can't remember his name? 6/10). Then came a very short "comedian" who wasn't very funny at all (but not as bad as Vladimir McTavish, so a 4/10) and then a very good, but very rude New Zealand comic who used the "c" word 5 times during his 10 minutes, which sent me into regular sideways glances to see how Mum was reacting to her Edinburgh experience. Anyway, this guy was supposed to be New Zealand's top comic ... although having done a google image search, I can't find any trace of him. Anyway, he'd be a 7/10 but downgrading him to a 6.5 for saying the "c" word a lot ... in front of my mum ... at a lunchtime show ... and for being fairly intimidating.

So, with nothing else to see until the Tattoo and the rain beating down, we decided to take shelter in the form of a wild card option ... Early Long Island Iced Tea which is directed by Mel Smith (yes, as in Smith and Jones) and I therefore thought it might be mildly funny. Didn't know if it was a play, musical or whatever, but it was certainly full of people more my Mum's age. It was an hour of caberet singing, and hour of caberet singing by an old queen (with a cracking voice it has to be said) singing old songs in an overly dramatic way. To add insult to injury, there were a few attempts at comical interludes which fell flat on their faces (unless you were of a certain age) which I presume were the inventions of Mr Smith. I was ready to cut my own ears off by the end of the hour. Mum seemed to enjoy it however.

Then onto the Tattoo. What a spectacle, not even dampened by having to sit in the heavy rain with my hood up and a bin liner over my legs. All in the name of "festival" my friends, all in the name of "festival".

Next up, Jason Cook with his new show, FEAR.

Nothing unexpected here. Saw him last year, brilliant. Saw him again this year, still brilliant.

You'll notice their are no accolades from the Guardian on his poster.

Top quality. Go see.

At this time of year, the papers are full of reviews for various shows at the Edinburgh Festival, and maaaaan, there's a lot of them. You can't walk anywhere in the city without a flyer or 10 being thrust into your path, all seemingly rated as the best show at the fringe by such and such.

But then it's all down to a matter of taste. I will therefore give humble opinion on shows to go and see and those to be avoided ... in order of appearance.

Vladimir McTavish: The Top 50 Scots Of All Time Pt II.

"A 2008 sell-out. Another affectionately scathing critique of one small nation's greatest icons."

‘Gleefully indulgent, highly appealing’ Guardian.

Now, I'm not a Guardian reader, in fact on the basis of their reviews, I don't intend to ever read the Guardian as my take on things would appear to be in direct contrast to this particular newspaper.

Far be it for me to be judgemental, but if I had seen the picture of Vladimir before we'd bought the tickets, I wouldn't have bothered. He doesn't strike me as the type of man who is going to make me laugh ... and he didn't, only in sympathy by the end of an gruellingly uncomforatble hour. I'm not sure how the Guardian could have thought otherwise. I was kind and gave him 5/10. Gemma (who is usually much kinder than me) gave him a 3/10 and said that was being generous. One to be missed in our opinion.

Sign up for the FREE FACEBOOK BOOKSHARE.

The idea came from bookcrossing.com where you can "release books into the wild" by registering it on their site (which gives it a unique number) and then leaving it in a random place (say a phone box or restaurant), letting people know on the website where you have left it and then another person finds it, reads it, reviews it on the site and leaves it in a random place for someone else to find (and so on and so forth).

I therefore signed up my own books and released them but they didn't like that very much because they said it was self-publicity (you're supposed to release books you've read and enjoyed, not ones you've written yourself) and not in the spirit of bookcrossing. I said this was a load of nonsense and why should my book be any different to anyone elses and they said ... we have some very top-profile authors on their site and if they self-promoted their own books they would shut down their profile too ... and I said something along the lines of "well I'm sure Stephen King doesn't have too much bother with publicity and wouldn't have to resort to releases his own books for free on bookcrossing in any case."

Needless to say, we fell out (apologies for the ultra-long sentences). So ... (deep breath) what I'm proposing to do is my own book crossing where you say which title you want to read, I send it to the 1st person that signs up, they read it, review it on the fan page, and then send it to the next person on the list, and so on a so forth ... so it's like a book share where all it costs you is the postage to send it to the next person on the list.

Does this make sense? Just leave you're name and the book you would like to read on my Facebook fan page (or send me a message) and I'll contact you with the craic.

Happy reading!

Now onto the next project, book 4. If you've been reading the earlier posts you'll know that I'll be returning to this once the film script is submitted far and wide.

Is it an image like this that puts people off the next book or possibly my writing ability? I'd like to thing it's the former. As soon as you mention it has the undead in it, people (especially girls) begin to turn their noses up.

All I wanted to say was ... ok, ok, it's going to be a book with zombie-esque characters in it but it's ultimately a book about survival and human emotions (God, that sounds boring) but a funny take on human emotions and surviving (now it sounds like an happy clappy self-help novel ... with zombies in it).

Look, all I'm saying is keep the faith. I'm writing it for me as I feel it deals with a lot of issues close to my heart but at the same time has a cracking story (I hope, still working on it) and is (as you would come to expect) a quirky, funny (dare I say HILARIOUS? Probably not) roller coaster of a yarn.

So don't be put off if you don't like zombies. It's going to be better written than anything I've done before, more amusing than 12 Months and Worlds Apart combined, have great characters, cracking storyline and leave you wishing the zombies would never end. This is going to be the last book before the snowball topples down the mountain side and really starts to gather momentum. I can feel it. You have been warned.

This is great. I'm actually receiving emails badgering me for updates. I never knew you cared.

Well my faithful followers (I don't think we'll need more than a pipe of Pringles for the catering for the first fan club meeting), my apologies for the lack of info. To use the words of my Mother-in-Law, I've had a touch of paralysis by analysis. I am formulating a plan however and it goes a little something like this.

I'm very close to finishing the second draft of the screenplay. I will then be sending it to Fluid Eye Productions (aka Doug who used to take my scriptwriting course - http://www.fluideyeproductions.co.uk/) for his keen fluid eye and valued comments. Then, making the changes and adjustments required to get to a final script I'm happy with.

As far as I see it, it's then a case of submitting it to anyone who will listen. The BBC accept submissions (unlike Channel 4, damn you) and I've also found this website, https://www.withoutabox.com/, which lists just about every film festival going on the planet.

It's something I've never really done ... the being patient and submitting things I mean. None of the books have been touted around the circuit as I just feel it's easier and quicker to do the bloody thing myself. So ... watch this space as they say. Won't be long until I actually start submitting things ... to people ... who know what they're talking about (allegedly).

Fingers crossed pleased, oh faithful handful of blog followers!

For those of you worried about the state of my mental health, fear not, for everything happens for a reason.

Take my interrupted sleep last night for example and this is true ... I woke up and wondered "whatever happened to the baby pictured on the front of Nevermind by Nirvana?" The album was released in 1991 so he'd now be 18 years old and I wondered if he boasted through High School about who he was or whether he had kept it a secret.

Well today, I found out who he was/is. His name is Spencer Elden, the son of the photographer's friend Rick Elden. It also transpires that Spencer Elden went onto appear on the cover of a cEvin Key (pronounced "Kevin Key") album in 2003.

And the pseudonym of cEvin Key??? ... Kevin William Crompton.

Following my last post I have nothing to report other than the "Making of Pinstripe" out-takes have been posted on YouTube and I'm fit and well after my annual colonoscopy.

Flew down to Bournemouth this morning to see my Mum (and watch Bournemouth v Spurs) and was amazed how much crap Ryanair can peddle in a one hour flight. Maybe I just noticed it more because we were on an early morning flight (not helped with not getting to sleep until 1.30am cus Gemma was finishing her article and then were up at 5.30am to get our flight) but, bloody hell, I was ready to wrestle the intercom off them and rip it out of the wall.

First of all we had the usual safety briefing, which I heard but didn't watch due to the fact I was trying to get some well needed kip. Then once the seatbelt lights had been turned off and I was just nodding nicely off to sleep we get the announcement over the tannoy that the cabin crew will be mincing up and down the aisle with the menu cards and went on to describe the majority of the items on the bloody menu (I recall frothy cappuccino, panninis etc etc). So up and down the aisle they mince asking every 2nd person, "menu cards? menu cards?" Once that was all over I settled my head on my hand once more in order to get some rest only for the tannoy to strike up again to announce that the cabin crew would now be circulating through the cabin with the inflight magazine which had a list of an exciting array of duty free items in the back. So up and down they strode again "In flight magazine? In flight magazine?" You expect these things when you go on a flight to a certain extent but it just went on and on ... and on. We were asked if we wanted to purchase Ryanair scratch cards with the chance to win thousands of fantastic prizes including a car and flight vouchers, Ryanair phone cards which could be used all over Europe or as a top to you mobile with a low call charge of only 6 cents per minute, we then had the tea trolley offering the delights from the menu (twice), and then a selection of perfumes from the duty free ... all announced on the tannoy and all involving the cabin crew mincing up and down the aisle trying to peddle their wares on a captive, albeit half-asleep audience.

I make that 7 times up and down the aisle (10 if you include 1 x collecting the menu cards, 1 x collecting the in-flight magazine and 1 x collecting the rubbish) which when you consider the flight is an hour and it's 15 mins before the seatbelt light goes off and 15mins before landing it comes back on again, that's somebody up and down the aisle ... and a bloody announcement every 3 to 5 minutes.

Further insult to injury is inflicted with the proficiency of the announcements. I'm all for foreigners practising their English but I wish they wouldn't do it (a) on a public address system, (b) when I'm trying to get some sleep and (c) when I have no-where to escape to.

So no Ryanair, I don't want any of your perfume however cheap, or coffee however expensive or any other crap that you might want to try and fob onto me whilst I'm at your mercy.

So I've now arrived in Poole having missed the hourly courtesy bus from the airport by 5 minutes and having to pay £25 for a taxi.

Nothing much to report at the mo although I have planned my objectives for the next 6 months.

1) Edit the Digging Deeper film script and submit to film type people. Receive rejections. Repeat process as required.

2) Whilst submitting film and waiting for rejections ... continue to write new novel (which I originally said would be out in the Autumn ... no chance)

3) If I get bored doing (1) or (2), have a go at actually writing the sit-com I've loosely come up with or writing the fighting fantasy book.

Do this whilst selling our current house, looking for a new house somewhere between Bath and Aberdeen (we've narrowed down the search parameters considerably), holding down a full-time job in a volatile construction industry and getting organised for G&H's wedding in France in August.

We also have tickets for the tattoo in Edinburgh next month and I'm looking to get tickets for U2 in Glasgow and A Band Called Quinn (if they're playing in the area any time soon).

Oh ... and I've signed up for twitter (not sure why) as THELEECROMPTON. Lee Crompton was "taken" but when you do a search for Lee Crompton, nothing comes up so I'm not quite sure how that works. They obviously heard I was coming.

Toodle Pip!

Just a quick snap shot of me as Mr Murray in the wonderful "Pinstripe".

Please notice that besides wearing John Gallagher's clothes (including his watch although I provided my own socks and undergarments) I'm also wearing my wedding ring. I didn't wear it during the film as I thought Mr Murray was too much of a c%ck to actually have a wife.

Also, if you pay close attention to the film you will see the boom come into shot as I walk along the underpass and that in the first scene I'm holding the cup in my right hand and then later on drop it from my left hand. Also, the furry boom makes a brief appearance in the close up of my feet walking.

In the outtakes Drew noticed that in one scene Ben holds the clapperboard too close to the camera and all you can see is the "tripe" of "Pinstripe". Enough said.

You know me, I love boy bands and wearing silly hats so I jumped at the chance to combine my two passions and went to see Take That last night at Hampden Park.

It is with regret that I reluctantly inform you it was actually very good ... well the show was and you kinda knew all the songs although it was an effort to hear Gary and the boys singing at some points over the incessant screeching of the permatanned, 30-something divorcees.

That said, a ruddy good show although I was mildly looking forward to seeing James Morrison in action (who was supporting) and whilst he was ok, he came across as a bit of a c%ck (and had an earring ... not good).

So, if you like large elephants and performing clowns (aka the audience and the Take That boys) then I suggest you get a ticket to the Take That circus.

Thought I'd include my response to a guy who is doing an article into whether or not the media is sesationalist when it comes to cancer and the possible causes.

Read your post on facebook and thought I'd drop you a line for what it's worth.

I think the coverage in the media is sensationalist ... stark warnings that eating X can cause cancer and eating Y increases your chances of having cancer in later life. While there are some very good guidelines suggesting what is good and bad, the media tends to portray this in a very narrow minded way. And the outcome? Do less people eat X & Y? I'm not sure it has a great effect overall although having said that I have heard some stories to the reverse. When the media come out and say eating X or Y can severely decrease your chances of getting cancer, the shops seems to sell out overnight.

The media want a headline story. Take Jade Goody for example. Whilst I think Jade Goody's sad plight did more for cancer awareness than many campaigns put together, the media, rather than taking this opportunity to help raise awareness with facts and advice or what you should do if you have specific symptoms, channel their energy on seemingly wanting to make Jade the next Princess Diana.

I have a personal interest in Bowel Cancer. My Dad died 12 months ago at the age of 55. Did he die of Bowel Cancer? Technically no. Having been initially diagnosed, had his operation in October 07 and went onto to complete 6 months chemotherapy. He was delighted to have been accepted for a trial drug programme which he had administered for 6 months on his "week off" from the main chemo drug. He battled through the treatment very positively and had booked to fly to Spain to get some sun on his back on the Saturday 31st May 2008. He finished his treatment on the previous Tuesday and had his lines taken out. He got the all clear on the Thursday, technically therefore having beaten cancer for the time being at least, only to drop down dead on the Friday with a massive pulmonary embolism.

I didn't know much about cancer until my Dad was diagnosed. I wish I still lived in ignorance in a way. I wouldn't then have had to be told that he had contracted the disease. I wouldn't have had to see the pain and distress he was in after his operation when the epidural giving him morphine became misplaced in his back and couldn't be repositioned ... or the problems he had with getting a line into his arm which resulted in having to have the chemo tubes stitched through his chest. So did he die from eating too much red meat or excessive amounts of salt? I don't know but I'd be more interested in knowing whether the trial drug had something to do with his death, or more research into whether or not chemotherapy should be combined with blood thinning drugs. I'm no expert but as far as I understand, chemotherapy can increase the risk of blood clots, Deep Vein Thrombosis, Pulmonary Embolus which is exactly what killed my Dad. So whilst I agree prevention is better than cure, instead of scaring people into avoiding eating red meat or too much salt, I'd rather know if blood thinning drugs would be beneficial to chemo patients (they seem to use them more frequently in the States but not so much over here) and what exactly was in the trial drug and did that in some way help or hinder my dad's predicament. Furthermore, should my dad's dose of chemo been reduced on the basis he's lost nearly 3 stone in weight since the beginning of his treatment.

Here's an excerpt from the Cancer Research website (admittedly for lung cancer)

There is a trial to find out if blood thinning drugs can improve treatment for lung cancer. Blood clots are quite common in people who have lung cancer. And cancer treatment can increase the risk of blood clots. Dalteparin is a blood thinning drug (anticoagulant), also called Fragmin. It is used to prevent and treat blood clots. Doctors think that dalteparin may also affect how cancer cells spread through the bloodstream, but they don't know for sure. So this trial is giving dalteparin alongside standard treatment for lung cancer to see if it reduces the number of blood clots people get. And to see if it can help to stop cancer cells spreading through the bloodstream to other parts of the body.

If you search for "blood chemo thinning" in Google there are numerous articles arguing the pros and cons of such drugs and whether they should be used in tandem with chemotherapy treatment.

Anyway, I don't know whether this is what you were after or not (but feel better for getting it off my chest all the same). I guess in summary, would I rather we were told to eat less red meat or given some hard facts about the reality of cancer and the effects it has on people's lives. I don't suppose I need to answer that. Is the media sensationalist? Well, what gets more coverage ... bowel cancer, the 2nd biggest cancer killer in the UK, or the far more sexy breast cancer?

I should make it quite clear I have nothing against Jade Goody or the good that breast cancer charities do. In my opinion though, it's a bit like the red meat issue ... let's get it into proportion and everything in moderation.